OOF
by XxDarkangelxX2003
Summary: Tales from the wastelands of Wez to the great cities of Gameindustri...
1. X FORCE 17

"The pride I feel for finally fingering my father's killer, is dampened, only by the fact that I promised to KILL my father's killer. I fingered myself... to DEATH."- Z Discord Crew.

* * *

It is the year 2017. Earth is at war, a war for survival long since begun.

In the beginning it began sort of pointlessly: someone shot someone else's cow with a sawed off carbine, and then they returned the favor by killing a couple dozen guys with purposefully-blunted carving knives. Long story short we ended up trying to invade Poland, but invading Poland never works, so we ended up spending all of our inheritance money driving tanks into swamps.

This is the story of those swamps.

It's been years since

The X-17 Force has been assembled to counter the CPUs. It is down to us few men to defeat the invaders with extreme pre-juice. After all, they are the ones who shot first. I think.

Just so you know it ain't _the_ X-II force it's just a bunch of random dudes. The 17th group of dudes, to be exact. The last few batches of guys all died in transit. Turns, out the american military cut spending, so they ran out of money for seat belts, and doors.

They have been training in combat simulations for years, and there is nothing on Earth that'd stand a chance against these honorable men. Too bad those competent people are all dead, so we've got only… these guys.

Now, on the streets of Detroit, the men and women of the United States Army stand proudly with the civilians they proudly conscripted. Along with the X-17 Force. The line intersected about halfway through. And by halfway, I mean that both groups contained all members.

"WHO THE HELL STOLE MY PORCH?" screamed Hunter, as he tried and failed to gun down the cat which was running away with his dinner. He had ordered chicken fingers, with extra fingers, and he was willing to kill to get it back. "I PAID LIKE FOUR BUCKS FOR THAT THING."

"Jesus Christ, shut up." Raven sighed, leaning more into the couch he was lying down on. "Can any of you quiet down? I don't need you all shouting like twelve year old children."

"It was him!" Recruit #3 said while pointing at a mirror with his voice being muffled by all the kevlar armor on his body.

As the man named Jimmy picked up the cancer ray, code named flying narwhal.

"Let operation green seaman start" the squad leader said

"What does Detroit export anyway? Abandoned cars?"

"Androids?" Recruit #3 offered.

"Real original. I can tell you thought about that, and not blatantly ripping it off from some David Cage game." Raven sarcastically drawled.

(Elsewhere in Gamindustri)

Deep within the Virtua Forest, a lone Planeptune adventurer came across the rotting body of a small child who appeared to have fallen from the sky.

"Goddammit, not another one! That's like the fourth one this week!" IF murmured, as she put the body into the wheelbarrow. "I swear, we need to start paying people to start cleaning up this crap."

(Back to Earth)

"Alright lads." Recruit #1765 announced in the back of the Black Hawk. "many of you will die today. But that's okay. Our target is the spaceship thing!"

"I WAS BORN TO DIE!" shouted recruit #3, or Tainted Three, as they punched themselves in the face.

On the other side of the Black Hawk, Raven simply sighed with their eyes closed.

"Shit, sir the enemy is locking on to us!" said one of the pilots

* * *

 _Well...I was looking through some google files and found this...piece of art?_

 _Well here's some back story, about a year ago in the town of Wez a various group of people, and a ghost made a half assed parody chapter of Zergface's Hyperdimension vs Earth story that was never completed._


	2. The Organization, COME AT ME!

**Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _Slowly a hum is heard and slowly it turns into a roar__

 _ _Slowly out of the cloudy skies over the mountain range a mighty warship appears__

 _ _It stays out of range of the town of wez, but it is impossible for it to hide__

 _ _and with it five smaller airships guard it__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Huh.

You guys see that?

I see that,

 _ _Stands atop the town hall.__

 _ _Peers down sniper scope at the thing.__

I wanna kill it.

 _ _Nudges__ _ ** _Devoted to the Four, Tainted~_**_ _ _.__

Maybe we should call Neptune about this one.

Then again, I wanna kill it.

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _Out of the airship a small missile is launched__

* * *

 **Devoted to the Four, Tainted~** 09/18/2018

 _ _Wandering out into the town outskirts, the girl lifts her head.__  
...Fuck, y'think they do diplomacy? Y'know, a lil'... talk and shoot them in the fuckin' dick?

Oh. A missile.

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Yup.

Missile.

* * *

 **Devoted to the Four, Tainted~** 09/18/2018

Y'think it's a dud? I think it's a dud.

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Nods, looking down sniper scope.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _A tiny missile__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

I think it's a dud.

I bet it's a dud.

* * *

 **Devoted to the Four, Tainted~** 09/18/2018

Probably a dud.

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _with no bombs on it nor gas__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Ten credits.

* * *

 **Devoted to the Four, Tainted~** 09/18/2018

Fifteen.

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Twenty, not going any higher.

Yup, give me twenty. __Eyes dud being torched.__

* * *

 **Devoted to the Four, Tainted~** 09/18/2018

 _ _Shrugging nonchalantly, she turns and wanders back inside the pub.__  
Fuck it, you deal with it, Mayor. Gonna' go take a piss and eat. See ya'.  
 _ _She smirks, raising her middle finger as she departs.__  
I don't even have five, so you'll have to take it from the treasury or some shit.

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Aye.

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _Another missile is launched, same as the one before__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Torched.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _This time it lands outside the city__ (edited)

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Torched.__

Heh.

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _another one is launched__

 _ _but is made to be fire-proof__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Torched.__

 _ _Doesn't burn.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _Out of the sides speakers appear__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Militiaman starts eating it.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

"ATTENTION PEOPLE OF WEZ WE COME IN PEACE!"

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Zerg takes aim at the thing with a sniper rifle.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _"THAT IS WHY YOU SHOULD STOP SHOOTING US, BURNING US, EATING US-" the voice went on listing varius ways the ATC soldiers have died__ (edited)

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Zerg fires a bullet at the speakers.__

 _ _Miss.__

 _ _Again.__

 _ _Miss.__

 _ _Again.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _"AND-OI STOP SHOOTING THE MISSILE!"__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Miss.__

What?

 _ _Zerg stopped shooting.__ (edited)

Oh...

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

"LISTEN HEAR YOU CRAZY FUCK! I HAVE TWO RECON UNITS WITH RIFLES AIMED AT YOUR HEAD!"*

"IF YOU CONTINUE TO SHOOT THEY WILL SHOOT BACK!"

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Zerg reloads.__

 _ _Shoots.__

 _ _Boom.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _A bullet flies by the mayors head__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Ha!

 _ _Scans area for sniper.__

 _ _Cant find him.__ (edited)

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _another bullet flies by__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Haha!

 _ _Scope is blurry.__

Hmm...

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _another bullet flies by but hits the something a flings back at the snipers__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Militiaman patrols continue their search.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _"HOLY FUCK" a scream is heard in the distance__

 _ _A pair of motorcycles are then seen driving away__

 _ _Two recon soldiers are on them and one of the soldiers has a bullet wound in their lower stomach__ (edited)

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

Hey!

They died!

Cool!

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _"wounded..." a voice whispers__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _Shoots voice.__ (edited)

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _The moon disappears__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

 _ _misses__

Wait

What

WHAT

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _The moon flickers back on with a voice appearing__

 _ _"hey Vsauce here"__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

You're fucking kidding me.

I quit. Going home. See you tomorrow.

 _ _Zerg renters the town hall, storming to the safety of his bedroom.__

 _ _Immediately Shoves Head under pillow, squeezing eyes shut.__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _Suddenly the ground cracks open as a giant tree monster jumps out and begins fighting the ancient lizard__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

FUCKING

 _ _Squeezes pillows into ear, harder__

 _ _Militiamen start shooting__

* * *

 **Edge** 09/18/2018

 _ _They fight until the ancient lizard sacrifices it self and uses its fire breath to launch itself into outer space__

* * *

 **Zergface ?** 09/18/2018

HELL

 _ _Eyes twitch__

* * *

 **September 20, 2018**

 **This was an RP session that occurred on the Wez Discord Server**


	3. Wez, Oh Wez(Was was that even the name?)

"What the actual fuck..." Edge the Edgelord(The edgest person ever) said, as he looked at the smoldering ruins of the town before him. "Seriously, what the actual fuck!" raising their arms up they continued, "I WAS GONE FOR A FUCKING MONTH AND THE TOWN GETS BLOWN UP". He kicked a skull that was lodge in the ground and watched it sore(I CANT spEEeLLlL?) through the air before crashing into the window of a car. He grumbled before walking into town, with is incoherent mumbles growing into a loud REEEE.

I'm an edgelord, what do you expect.

His reeing stopped when he saw the ruin of the most memorable building that could be found in the town.

The Pub.

"SERIOUSLY! THE ONE PLACE THAT I TRIED SO DESPERATELY AND SECRETLY TRIED TO DESTROY GETS DESTROYED BY A...a...what did happen here?" Edge adopted a thinking poise before giving up with a "fuck...". Sighing he took a glance at the pub before shrugging and decided to head on in.

Inside he found...well bodies...a fuck ton of them.

"You know I should have asked how they fit so many people in here," he said as he took a seat on a stool with the neighboring stool having a skeleton on it which was cradling a beer. "Oh hey, Zerg" Edge said as he grabbed the beer and pushed Zerg's skeleton off the seat and took a swing from the empty beer bottle.

"I Wonder happened to the organization?" Edge question as the ceiling let out a groan and a body fell through, said body belonged to the leader of Dealta(This is how it is spelled) team. "Oh, alright," he said as he reached into the chest pocket of Dealta leader and pulled out a cigar. Placing the cigarette in his mouth he pretended to take a swing of the death stick.

"I Don't want to set the world on fire~" He began to sing as he remembered the time he spent in the town of Wez.

"I only want to start a flame in your heart~"

In the furture, many would make mention of Edge and would call him a wannabe edgelord.

* * *

 **So...The town of Wez got blown up.**

 **AND I MISSED IT!**

 **From what I've heard from a source of mine (WINKS AT THEM IF THEY READ THIS) a it was put to a vote or something.**

 **A shame, a real shame.**

 **So much edgeyness lost.**


	4. EDGE DOES A TING!

**This is a shit post saga.**

 **Deal with it.**

 **Don't expect it to be pretty.**

 **Only for it to be Shitty.**

Long long long LOOOONNNNGGGGG ago there was an edgelord, an edgelord so edgy he changed his name to edge to increase his edginess. He watched as those around did things he wanted to be part of but could not because of his incompetence until he had the idea to create his own group and town!

But that failed.

Hard.

So a few years later we find edgelord living in a dumpster in Planeptune!

The hatch to edges door opened and Edge crawled out and fell to the ground with an "OOF!". His once pitch black clothing now ragged and filthy, the same could be said about his hygiene.

"OI FOOK OFF CUNT!"

OI I'M YYYyyyYYooooOOOuuuuUUU dum arse.

"SO WHAT!"

Edge then punches himself in the crotch.

"FUCK!"

again.

"FUCK!"

and again.

"FOOK!"

Again.

"I'M SOARRY!"

Then after four consecutive punches, he finally stops and lays on the ground accepting that this was his life. "Why did Wez have to FUCKING blow up, that place was awesome!" standing up he began to list how awesome the place off.

"Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah BlahBlah BlahBlah Blah Blah CTRL+V Blah Blah Blah Blah"

"Pudding Pudding going to get pudding~" and by pure(FORCED) coincidence we find the bane of all 4th walls skipping by. Edge also caught sight of the CPU and had a brilliant idea "Oh I know! I'll just kidnap Derple Heart and hypnotize her into submission and have her rebuild Wez and send in some prisoners to be the colonists! just like the Brits!" with that said Edge ran out and followed after the CPU.


End file.
